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chaotica

- 3 years ago

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How do you balance growing up and staying childlike?

As a young adult, I'm coming to a point where I have to seriously start "growing up". But I'm also determined to keep some of my childlikeness -- too many adults are too serious and "mature" and don't appreciate life for what it is; they just drift through life, serious and jaded, not even paying attention as life passes them by. Obviously, this is not what I want to become. But I also don't want to be that loser "college buddy" guy who never grew up and is still living in his parents' basement at 43, trying to get his old buddies to run off to Vegas for a weekend with him.... So my question is: How do I find a balance between growing up and staying young at heart? At what point does a mature adult become a mindless stiff, and what separates youthfulness from just plain immaturity? Thoughts/advice?

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One of the joys of being a senior you can be whoever you wish to be. I find I can be childlike and enjoy life while being an adult. "Growing up" is a way society expects people to behave. But to take pleasures in snails, and dandelions and worms crawly is great and being able to express glee at these things is wonderful. I guess at my age I don't care what society thinks of me. I just need to be true to myself and Baha'u'llah

I'm 16 and am having a hard time trying to figure that out too. My parents, teachers, and other adults who know me well often times tell me I'm growing up too fast. I don't notice. Maybe I've matured quickly for someone my age. I've been told numerous times that I need to go out and have a good time and that I need to stop stressing about things that are out of my control. For a long while, I really wrestled with the psycology of religion. It's something that still intrigues me, but I've realized that it isn't critical to living a happy life. That's just an example of a way that I've matured much too quickly. How many 16 year old kids do you know who worry about what will happen to them when they pass? I'm still a kid having trouble finding a balance. Maybe I'm not as mature as I'd like to think, but to me maturity has nothing to do with age.

Smoke lots of pot.

I think that we must never stop learning, exploring, investigating, and allowing the earth's mysteries to keep us astounded. That's what keeps healthy children moving forward, and I truly believe it's for adults as well.

I stay with what is inside. In return, what shows on the outside is the younger inside and no one ever knows my biological age! You project who you are depending on where you are coming from. So as you grow older in years, remember who you are in your heart and live you life through that inner age and you will always be young and full of life and that is what you will continue to bring into your life!

Just always remember to be responsible with an open mind toward things. Once you close your mind off to differences that is when you become "old"

Imagination with moderation. I am a child in an adult body myself. I like puddle stomping, collect Crayola crayons, and love to think small. The best thing about it is I found a way to enjoy it without giving anything up. If you are still living in your parents basement at 43 and calling your buddies to go to Vegas, you aren't going back far enough. You got stuck at 21, the best way to get out of that is find an apartment, get a pet, take on a big responsibility like becoming a big brother/big sister. Look for responsibility if you want to grow up. Adults don't take enough responsiblity for them-selves anymore. If something bad happens they look for someone else to blame. My way to stay young, is to own coloring books, and the coolest collection of crayons in town. I have games and toys that do no require batteries, and I love to use them to tutor little people to read, or learn how to have math or science make sense. The easiest way to teach any kid anything is to ask him if his teacher talks to the blackboard. Once I say that, they know I remember what it was to be a kid, and that I can help. I used this to help get a girl off drugs. I taught her how to cross-stitch and showed her that she could do something positive. She gave the project to her mom, and learned that her mother loved her, and wanted to help her, they went into business together making crafts. Being a grown up scare others as much as it does yourself, but with a good sense of humor you realise that you always grow older, but you never grow up. I will be 43 next month, and I know that I am getting older, my train of thought keeps derailing, but as long as you can laugh at yourself, nobody else can laugh at you, only with you

Remember to stay in truth, your truth and live life with a child's innocence. Of course, you have your daily routine, work, job, family, school, etc..... But remind yourself what life looks life through childrens eyes. We still, and will aways carry that with us. We are all, at a soul level, innconent beings, experiancing life through ways that sometimes jade us and make us feel we have to become this, or that. Become You! Those who love you, will respect you, and those who think your acting childlish, never really understood the importance of living with joy, laughter, connection, and love. To them, it's all just a rat race.

Be willing to change your mind. Don't confuse your opinions with your self. Have fun before you leave home in the morning.

Go outside as much as you can. Walk in all weather conditions, talk to animals and touch water, earth and feel the wind.

Asking questions. Ask anything. That sense of wonder is vital for a young mind. As a child, I looked out two windows in my house and was astounded to see a moon in each window. There was an upstairs moon and a downstairs moon! Last summer, at the age of 20, I ran into a Florida yard to investigate a palm tree branch that had blown down (I'd just moved there). Keep sharing your wonder, asking questions, and discovering.

First - rules from improvisation also apply to staying childlike: say YES. Build on what's around you. Be excited to fail, because that's how you learn. Second - Be true to yourself. I always had this idea of what an 'adult' was supposed to be. As I got older I kept fighting against that adult definition I had in my head. One day I realized I WAS an adult, but I was still the same person I'd always been. I didn't become what I thought was an adult, I had became the adult I wanted to be. Third - Pursue your dreams cleverly. I wanted to be happy when I got a job, so I looked at my life and what made me happy: I liked to draw. I liked to tell stories. I liked to act. I looked around and tried to find a job that had those elements. Look at your own life at what you like to do, find a job that has those elements, and pursue it!

Childhood was about music and imagination in my house. For as long as I can remember I have been in awe of music. For instance listening to a great album I used to be crazy about like Carole Kings "tapestry" or seeing a great band live always makes me get a giant kid smile. Also we never had a TV growing up, which meant imagining a story. Imagination seems to be one thing that really separates kids and adults. I write short stories, and do improve stuff with my friends and that seems to work in expressing my imagination. Staying childlike is remembering and keeping what made me happy as a child.

Aren't all adults just large children anyway? Have you recently seen an adult temper-tantrum at work, or perhaps at the airport (when a flight is delayed)? I know I have. Remember that not all childlike qualities are that desirable. Growing-up is not necessarily a bad thing, hopefully you are learning to become a better version of yourself. Coping with the responsibilities of being an adult can be challenging; it's something I struggle with too; paying the bills, home repairs, stress at work, etc.,. I ask myself questions and give myself reminders to help temper my anxieties, e.g.; What's the worst that can happen? --> helps me keep my problems in perspective Will my family and friends still love me? --> reminds me of what is really important It's only money. --> money is only a tool to help enable life experiences How will worrying about this help me deal with it? --> helps me to stop worrying about things I cannot control; and prompts me to action on the things I can control. Is this how I would be spending my time if I were to die tomorrow? --> we are all human will eventually pass away; reminds me to enjoy life and do the important things

i kind of have the same problem, but basically what i do is i get all my stuff done (like homework and chores, or a job if i was able to get one) and then i spend the rest of my time acting like a kid. it works for me. just remember to have fun. if something isn't fun then make it fun. make it worth your time, don't just do it because you have to, try to enjoy it. ...sorry, i dont know if that would help at all. i'm 13 so i dont really have much life experience.

I asked a little boy once about this , 9 year old Harry Power , and he told me , " when we go to the park , don't sit on the bench, get on the swings , and play .."

O SON OF SPIRIT! My first counsel is this: Possess a pure, kindly and radiant heart, that thine may be a sovereignty ancient, imperishable and everlasting. -Baha'u'llah

There is a lot of baggage that comes with maturity, and most of it is not necessary. Most "adult" behavior is a misguided attempt at maintaining a level of dignity and decorum. And while there is certainly a time and place for such behavior, it is usually the exception rather than the norm. The true differentiating factor between "maturity" and "immaturity" (which is really the better distinction, as opposed to "adult" and "child") is responsibility. Be reliable. Take responsibility for your actions, be aware of how your actions affect yourself and others, and behave accordingly. When you say you'll do something, get it done. When you see something wrong, speak up about it. That is how you be an adult. How do you stay a child? Always wonder. Retain your fascination with life. Pay close attention to the small details, and don't take anything for granted. Make sure that the next rose you hold smells just as good as the last one. Watch how a garden spider spins its web - or even better, take a picture of the web with the early morning dew hanging from the threads. Appreciate small treats (like candy) - but remember that in order for them to be meaningful, they must be taken in moderation! I am a responsible father of two, but I will always be a child because I have a constant appreciation for the life that I have and the world around me, and if my 5 year old daughter wants to dance with me to some silly song on the sidewalk, I don't give a darn what I look like or what anyone thinks - I'll be dancing with her faster than you can say "footloose"!

Good for you for asking such a great question. Balance is very important. I'm an older woman who always has done the right thing and been the responsible one. Now I want to walk away from it and let somebody take care of it. I want to scream out of windows and do things a "woman my age" should not do. Make time for both. Devote yourself to your work. When work is over, play. And if the two overlap sometimes, great. We spend so much time worrying about what other people will think of us if we do something different. As long as you get your work done and are reliable and trustworthy, no one's going to rip you apart if you spend five minutes speaking Cockney one day. Sure some people will think your an idiot, but are they really the people you care about. Most people will admire you connectedness to your inner child and you bring more fun to their lives. They are the ones who will admire you and think I wish I could be more like him. If you've got a chance to dance, take it! Good luck!

Great advice everyone! thanks ;)

@chaotica Canada

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How do you balance growing up and staying childlike?

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Smoke lots of pot.

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I think that we must never stop learning, exploring, investigating, and allowing the earth's mysteries to keep us astounded. That's what keeps healthy children moving forward, and I truly believe it's for adults as well.

desrtrse

comascape

Just always remember to be responsible with an open mind toward things. Once you close your mind off to differences that is when you become "old"

mapease

minthamae

robinlawrie

Be willing to change your mind. Don't confuse your opinions with your self. Have fun before you leave home in the morning.

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Go outside as much as you can. Walk in all weather conditions, talk to animals and touch water, earth and feel the wind.

ae_sanders

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I asked a little boy once about this , 9 year old Harry Power , and he told me , " when we go to the park , don't sit on the bench, get on the swings , and play .."

Heath

O SON OF SPIRIT! My first counsel is this: Possess a pure, kindly and radiant heart, that thine may be a sovereignty ancient, imperishable and everlasting. -Baha'u'llah

MatthewG

Trishylouwho

chaotica

Great advice everyone! thanks ;)

How do you balance growing up and staying childlike?

Smoke lots of pot.

I think that we must never stop learning, exploring, investigating, and allowing the earth's mysteries to keep us astounded. That's what keeps healthy children moving forward, and I truly believe it's for adults as well.

Just always remember to be responsible with an open mind toward things. Once you close your mind off to differences that is when you become "old"

Be willing to change your mind. Don't confuse your opinions with your self. Have fun before you leave home in the morning.

Go outside as much as you can. Walk in all weather conditions, talk to animals and touch water, earth and feel the wind.

I asked a little boy once about this , 9 year old Harry Power , and he told me , " when we go to the park , don't sit on the bench, get on the swings , and play .."

O SON OF SPIRIT! My first counsel is this: Possess a pure, kindly and radiant heart, that thine may be a sovereignty ancient, imperishable and everlasting. -Baha'u'llah

Great advice everyone! thanks ;)

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