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We have to be responsible for our own behavior always. You can only control and understand your own intentions and behavior. I think the key is what was the persons intention.....in deciding how you receive it. Another persons intentionally brought bad disrepectful behavior is impossible to understand or figure out so it is best not to spend your energy doing so, don't even react, let it go by. They will most likely blame it on you and not be accountable for their own actions.......if you engage in this it is like engaging a concrete wall. Its simple actually....its easy to be nice and the golden rule...rules.
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Got it the wrong way around, methinks. We need to learn to be open and receptive to everything we encounter firstly. Behaviours (both ours and others) will adjust themselves accordingly.
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First, some people can't change their beahavior, like mentally disordered people. Furthermore, people in general don't adjust their behavior, because they don't care about anybody else than themselves, so why should we in return adjust ours ? Don't know if that answers the question, which I have actually not understood...
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Both. Marianne Moore, a poet, wrote a poem about understanding poetry. She says in her poem that it's not fair to hate what you don't understand, in reference to people badmouthing poetry. I think that relates a lot to behavior, people hate what they don't understand and blame the person for it. But sometimes, the person behaving is just a jerk, or a kid who needs an attitude adjustment. It's why you got to pick your battles, see what's for real and what's just a bad attitude.
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A bit of both. "I am who I am" in proper measure renders quiet self-confidence and assurance. Too much renders an attitude of arrogance or self-importance; selfishness. . . a "Here I come, everyone get out of the way" mentality whereby everyone else needs to adjust and submit to you. Not enough renders an undecided, uncertain, disingenuous, chameleon-like character that many find unnerving to be around. Whether we like to believe it or not, there ARE other people in the world besides us! Just as they need to allow for us, we need to allow for them. We are individuals, but we are also a society -- a contributing part of the whole. Either accept that or go live alone in the bush. While we cannot control how others receive our behaviour, repeated negative reactions relating to a certain aspect of it should invite introspection; not arrogant insistence they adjust. And perhaps that is a kind of touchstone: a desire to justify one's conduct is a sign of friction against the society. If one is convinced those actions are a right choice for all, even in the face of the "norm", they will just quietly live those actions within the framework of society, becoming a positive influence for others to "join in". The idea is to remember the parts fit within the whole rather than the whole fitting around the parts! And the warning sight is when one is not so sure about the actions/attitudes they are taking, are conflicted internally, and lash out in response with behaviour problems and the insistence that everyone else needs to adjust to them. It's the sign of a self-destruct mode activating. I think all of us will visit it from time to time. The danger is in deciding to stay there and make it a home.
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